A Hypercridical Feeling

Only my closest friend and close family, know about my creation of Mathis. Now due to a large change in my life, I would like to share with you a short passage I wrote last year.

Mathis walked the beaches of the world all his life trying to find the perfect moment.
After walking the last beach he realised how many moments he waisted try to find that perfect moment.
25/11/07 - Dylan Bray

After a long week I feel as if my passage on the pavement, has been thrown on the beach. It will be a while until I make my way to the pavement again. But I dont mean this to be all about me. This is about my hero, my father. Mathew passed away on the 6/5/08. He will be miss not only by me, but every one who knew and loved him.

Live, for most that have walked this earth cant. - Dylan Bray 15/5/08

Small change to life

My something changed today, caused by freewill. I chose for it to happen and I accept any consequences. This will not affect anyone around me, for it is not for most. The change is not for show to those to judge, it is for those who are interested. I chose the change for a feeling of pride and to tell myself that if im going to do something, I will do it. I did change.

- Refering to my tattoo. But also to anyone else who is afraid of comitment and change.

Drunken Underclass

I find most things funny. But courage is some thing that I lack and feel want. Sometimes it comes out, but like the rabbit, I long for a dark hole. Backing down and walking off summarises most of my personality. I stand for what I think is right, yet when conflict comes I do not stand my ground. Bringing hate to myself, is always the end result. Was I made this way? No, it was brought on by force. Years of torcher and coming last, has left me a shadow of myself. Thing's i would like to say, either don't come easy or not at all. I guess that if I just continue to be who i am, I will eventually fade. Really is that so bad, to just leave this all behind.

Fade - To be with ones self and ones own thoughts.

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I would like to take a step back, but you would rather kick me back. We talk as if we are all about to die, but really, are we not already dead.

Rise - To be blind.

Miles of no left turns

It seams to haunt me, for hours and some times days. This weekly repetition, why do I do it? Is it because I'm looking for some thing that i will never find. I don't look, maybe that is my problem. Problems, so many, only wish they would resolve. Hiding from resolution is what i do, but I want it to stop. Please make it stop. The voices hurt, like the memories that i hold. They stay with me day by day. All i really want to do, is turn left.